The Times: John Sergeant's got no talent, insist judges
Another one in the eye for the experts: "'We're judging on the ability of dance,' said the panellist Arlene Phillips. 'It's very well that people fall in love with a man, but what his feet are doing isn't a foxtrot.'"
(tags: BBC humour feats)

The Times: Rickrolling turns Rick [...]

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Found magazine: Ahoy Pastafarians
"FACT: The earth was created by an invisible and undetectable Flying Spaghetti Monster. All evidence for evolution was planted by the Him in an effort to test the faith of Pastafarians - the chosen people." If you haven't been touched by His Noodly Appendage so far in your life, click through and [...]

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The Guardian: Jamie Hewlett draws Time Out cover
This is possibly just a big plug for Time Out - but, there again, the magazine is printing a gallery of previous covers Hewlett has designed, a Hewlett-penned Monkey comic strip and a Hewlett-designed iTunes download card with a free download - so fans should probably get down [...]

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Oh dear - it’s as inevitable as your pets dying, even Joss Whedon and Chris Carter couldn’t work out how to avoid it. But when you suddenly realise that TV shows that you’ve been watching and enjoying are swirling around the toilet bowl on their way down the drain, it’s still a terribly depressing moment. No matter how many times you experience it.

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Great news from this morning’s Media Guardian. This year’s British Comedy Awards will feature a tribute to the late comedy producer, writer and performer Geoffrey Perkins.

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Sick of being threatened with eternal damnation on your daily commute? Here’s your opportunity to strike back…

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We live in a time when a considerable number of people believe The End of Days to be imminent. But evidently ours not the first era in which this belief was widespread. The Millerites were a sect of 19th-century American baptists convinced that Jesus was set to turn up in 1844. Hindsight, of course, is a great thing.

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Something tells me that most of us would be better off not summoning the emergency services for hamster rescue - if we have no personal connection to trade on, that is…

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The moral of this tale? If contemplating breaking and entering - buy a decent belt.

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What I’m reading online today - if you like what you see, add me to your Delicious network…

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